Kantbot

Episode 9: Speedrunning on Empty (w/ RWhiteGoose)

Added 2020-04-30 01:52:44 +0000 UTC

You've waited your whole life for this. You've trained. You've perfected your craft. You've devoted thousands of hours. You're ready. Flown by black helicopter to a remote island, you're about to meet with... The Elite. The greatest Goldeneye 007 for the N64 speedrunners in the world. The fastest. The deadliest. They're waiting to be impressed. Do you think you have the right stuff?

Before you have a chance, though, on your way from the helicopter pad, your convoy is attacked. A mysterious man in black pulls you out of the back seat and spirits you away. Who is this Zoro type rogue? He pulls away his mask, revealing his face. "Could it be? But I thought he was dead," you wonder to yourself. It's none other than Punished Goose . Formerly one of the greatest Goldeneye runners the the game had ever known. Now, an exile, documenting the secret and forbidden lore of speedrunning from his illegal youtube broadcasting station somewhere in South Africa.

He stretches out his hand, a wry smile on his face. "I'm here to save you," he says. Do you take it? Will you side with the Elite? Or with this madman speedrunning terrorist? The choice is yours.

(Intro Theme: "Spirits" by Cor Serpentis, from the album Atria. Outro Theme: "Lifetime of Grey Skies" by Nishiki Prestige, from the album XOXO. Interlude: "name and form" by subboreal, from the album childhood's end. All music courtesy of Lovecrypt. Episode mastered by Tryppocales Records)