In Deadpool With a System [18]

Dane nodded casually. “Yep. If you want to check, be my guest. Just be prepared to dig through layers of puke to figure out who’s who.”

Ajax glanced through the window again. The dense yellow fog inside the room was proof enough.

“No need. The air quality in there says it all.”

Checking his watch again, he muttered, “Now, we wait.”

Dane yawned. “What time is it?”

“2:30 AM.”

Dane blinked. “Huh. That late already? I usually sleep by 10:30. Damn, I just pulled overtime.”

[Ajax is actively ignoring you. If this experiment fails, he will definitely kill you.]

[Undying Resistance +10 (Current Undying Resistance: 60)]

Dane stretched again. “Speaking of which, where am I sleeping tonight?”

Ajax’s eyelid twitched.

Keeping you around any longer would be an absolute nightmare.

[Ajax has decided to send you away just to get rid of you.]

[Undying Resistance +10 (Current Undying Resistance: 70)]

He turned to one of his men. “Take him back.”

A guard without a gas mask stepped forward. “Come with me.”

Dane raised an eyebrow. “Where to?”

The guard sighed. “You wanted to sleep, right? Let’s go.”

Dane grinned. “Ah, yeah, true. I am a little tired. Oh, and Ajax—”

Ajax didn’t respond.

Dane smirked. “Let me know what kind of powers they awaken tomorrow. I’m curious.”

[Ajax is now seriously questioning if you have brain damage.]

[You are acting more like the leader than he is.]

[Undying Resistance +10 (Current Undying Resistance: 80)]

Chapter 7: A Roommate Problem

The walk back was far from quiet.

With Dane around, silence was impossible.

“Hey, the food here is pretty decent. The accommodations must be nice too, right?”

The escort said nothing and kept walking.

They reached the elevator. The man pressed the button for the fourth floor.

Dane raised an eyebrow. “We’re not gonna be sharing a room, right?”

He crossed his arms. “Just so we’re clear—I hate roommates who snore, grind their teeth, or play League of Legends until dawn.”

The man ignored him.

Dane continued anyway. “Also, I go to bed at 10:30 sharp. I expect lights off before then. You do realize there’s a difference between sleeping in the dark and sleeping with the lights on, right?”

[Your escort is secretly relieved that he doesn’t have to share a room with you.]

[Otherwise, you’d talk him to death.]

[Healing Ability +10 (Current Healing Ability: 60)]

—

The elevator doors slid open.

The man led the way down a corridor lined with iron-barred doors—prison cells, essentially.

Dane’s gaze swept the area. “Wait… did you guys base this place on an actual prison?”

No response.

The man walked a few steps further before stopping at Cell 08.

He unlocked the door and gestured inside.

Dane peeked in.

There were two beds, both with plain white sheets.

On one of them sat a burly man, wearing a pink tank top.

At that exact moment, the man set down a handheld mirror, his expectant eyes locking onto Dane.

A chill ran down Dane’s spine.

“No way. I’m a mentor for new mutants! How could I possibly share a room with a guy in a pink tank top?”**

He turned on his heel. “Our aesthetics don’t match. I demand a new roommate! Preferably a woman in a pink tank top—or better yet, a pink woman without a tank top!”

CLANK!

Something cold and heavy snapped around Dane’s neck.

He barely had time to react before—

“Get inside.”

A hard shove sent him stumbling forward into the room.

“Hey—wait! Hold on!”

Dane spun around, ready to run out, but—

BANG!

The door slammed shut right in his face.

—

From the other side of the bars, his escort grinned smugly.

Dane blinked. “Wait… You can talk?”

The man shrugged. “I just didn’t feel like talking to you.”

He smirked. “But now that you’re locked up, I don’t have to worry about you releasing that damn gas anymore.”

Dane scoffed. “First off, that’s not ‘gas.’”

He folded his arms. “I have a medical condition, okay? I can’t ‘expel waste’ properly. My body has basically turned into a swamp, and the gas comes from that.”

[You have successfully created a reasonable explanation for your emissions.]

[Odor Resistance +10 (Current Odor Resistance: 80)]

The man rolled his eyes. “I don’t care what’s inside you. Just stay put.”

Without another word, he turned and walked away.

“Wait, if you lock me up in here, I guarantee you’ll regret it.”

Gripping the iron bars, Dane pressed his head between two of them, mimicking the famous scene from The Shining where Jack Torrance shoved his face through a broken door. His grin was eerie, but his tone carried a dangerous certainty.

“Regret? I don’t think you have anything that could make me regret this.”

Dane’s smile widened. “Think about those five test subjects in that room. If my gas really does awaken their mutant abilities, Ajax will definitely value me more than anyone else. He’s been searching for the fastest way to create mutants, and I just might be the key he’s looking for. Once I gain his trust, a single word from me could make you the next test subject.”

[Threat successful.]

[Escort now considers the consequences. If true, he has offended a future high-ranking figure.]

[Mental Manipulation +20 (Current Mental Manipulation: 50)]

[Critical Hit!]

[Mental Resistance +20 (Current Mental Resistance: 80)]

“Nonsense! There’s no way your farts can awaken mutants! What happened last time was just a coincidence.”

“Then you’ll know soon enough. If those five wake up with powers, I’ll be having a nice little chat with Ajax about who should be next in line for experimentation.”

The escort hesitated. His expression shifted from confidence to uncertainty. Locking Dane up had seemed like a good idea at first, but now… he wasn’t so sure. The possibility that Dane could become a key figure in the facility was something he couldn’t ignore.

“What… what do you want?” His voice had lost its edge, betraying the nervous thoughts racing through his mind.

“I’m not asking for a luxury suite. I know you can’t pull that off. But at the very least, get me a room with a private bathroom where I can shower.”